Skin of a Drum

And I can't become my father
When it's all been said and done
His completions won't complete me
I've divided me by oneI'm the answer to his riddle
I'm the caution of his wind
I'm the spoon wedged between tongue and teeth
Beneath his trembling grinAnd I dare add my revision
For I dare not suffer twice
And I dare not reinvent the past
And I dare not be the ChristAnd I welcome any sufferer
And I welcome any Saul
Sitting in this room, on wooden bench
Waiting for Joi to callAnd I suffer here alone, Lord
Perturbed by my every thought
How I've tried to strip them to the bone
I've struggled and I've foughtEvery jealous warped intention
Smuggled, sewn into genes
Every hidden mongrel tendency
Exploiting me in meEach time I put them under
But still they wanna test me
I cry out through the thunder
You storm right past meI search and I ponder
I question and wonder
I roar and I thunder
Please let me inI've been waiting here
For what now seems the better of an hour
I've raised every crippled question
From the dead and given powerTo the absence of my sanity
The presence of a fear
That lies in between forgotten dreams
That pile up every yearUp above the highest testaments
Down below the wooden floor
There's a gutted room, pitch black at noon
Beneath a hidden doorDeep within you'll find
The attributes of every sunken man
Who must bang his head against the dead
Each day he tries to standAnd he's standing pressed against
The very woman that he loves
Kissing eyes and lips, embracing hips
Surrendering to her touchAnd just at the very moment
That he touches heart to heart
She pulls from his touch
'Cause it's too much to mend what's torn apartEach time I put them under
But still they wanna test me
I cry out through the thunder
You storm right past meI search and I ponder
I question and wonder
I roar and I thunder
Please let me inIt's so hard to be the man I would be
If hatred and fear no longer appeared
I swear I've become the skin of a drum
The heart of a man, divided I stand